Posted by: biblestudyseattle | July 11, 2012

Man Caves

The term man cave refers to a space in the house that is the man’s escape.  Remember Genesis 2:15:  “The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and take care of it.”  God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.  I will make a helper suitable for him.”

There’s a saying, a home is a man’s castle.  But why would a man want to inhabit only a cave in that castle?

He doesn’t.  He’d prefer to be around his wife, but something goes wrong.  After the fall, God pronounced a curse:  “your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”

The husband was not supposed to rule his wife; they were to be harmonious partners.  But because of the fall, Eve desires her husband.  That is to say she desires from him what is only possible from God.  The husband fails: he is not God.  But the woman keeps trying to get out of her husband what can’t be had.  This is the origin of nagging.  The wife is not supposed to nag, and the husband is not supposed to rule over her.  Most wives end up using chores or children try get from their husband what they can only get from God – perfect attention, understanding every emotion, etc.  To the husband, it feels like control, and he reacts – sometimes to his man cave, sometimes by ruling her.  Relationships should not be about control, but about peacefully enjoying each other’s company.  Often the wife wants to feel together, so she says, “Honey, can you do X?”  This often feels like control to a man.  If she wants to feel together, why doesn’t she just make pleasant conversation with him?  If chores or kids take center stage in a marriage, there’s a serious problem.

The general consensus is that most marital problems are the man’s fault.  Really?  Where does the bible say that?  Are women so saintly that men have a monopoly on sin?  Many women who have children view their husbands as her helper.  Isn’t that backward?  Surely the man should help with the children and even lead, but the woman should not use the children to become man of the house.


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